Monday, March 29, 2010

Week #3

I have a little confession to make. I'm slowly getting back into my old routine. Looking back on the past week I've realized that I've snuck a few extra bites here, a couple there. And of course, it's reflected in my weigh-in this week. Maybe now that I've realized it, I can get myself back on track. Like Thursday morning, for example, after the final walk-through at our house (it's so great to be able to say that!), we went to Country Cookin' for breakfast before we had to go to Warrenton for closing. I had a HUGE breakfast. Maybe not as big as I used to have, but big enough. I kinda TOTALLY blew out portion sizes, reasoning with myself that it's breakfast and therefore it'll be fine. Then on Friday, my parents and I went out to a Chinese buffet. Okay, let me just say up front that anything "buffet" is almost guaranteed BAD for a diet. I was good and got a good helping of green beans, but I got crab rangoons. For those of you that don't know, crab rangoons are crab, cream cheese, shallots, and a couple other ingredients wrapped and DEEP FRIED in wonton wrappers. Well, when I've had them in the past, they've been large enough that one, possibly two, would equal a portion size. Not this night. China Garden had little bite-size ones. Oh...holy...crap! I told myself to be good and I only grabbed about 5. Really good, right? Well, I was then really bad and went up for seconds. Of just about everything! Yes, even the beans (again, my twisted reasoning said that that was okay). I wasn't hungry anymore after the first plate. I was satisfied. After the second plate, I felt stuffed to the gills. Safe to say I didn't have dessert that night.
So, all that said, I'm going to try to get back on track. And this week's lucky number is...

246. Yes, I lost another two pounds. I'm excited, don't get me wrong, but I honestly didn't think I would, or even should have. And, I'll admit, I'm a little nervous about moving out. Mom's always made a balanced meal. I guess it was a good thing I started this while Mike and I still lived with mom and dad, or else I wouldn't have been able to get off the ground. After this week I'll have to fend for myself as far as planning meals. When Mike and I lived next to work, 99% of my meals consisted of pasta, pasta, and more pasta. No wonder at my weight, right? It'll be a challenge, but I'm really excited about using my own kitchen, so hopefully I'll come up with some good stuff...or at least something edible!
So tune in next time, kids. We'll get to see what I whip up in my own kitchen. We'll also get to see what I look like...hopefully at least 20 pounds lighter...?

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Very Funny it is to Laugh

For those of you that seem to like my rantings about my temptations and such throughout my dieting, here's a funny little entry for you...
We all know that I LOVE pasta. I'm pretty sure I mentioned that a couple entries ago. Well, tonight mom made spaghetti and her homemade sauce. Salad and Italian bread went with it, of course. I was first up to plate my food. Now, everyone knows that no matter how little spaghetti you want, you always end up with a heaping amount because it all sticks together (unless you use oil or something, but obviously that wasn't the case here and therefore I wouldn't be telling it as part of my funny entry). A portion size is about a cup of pasta. Now, for someone like me who loves pasta, that's not really a whole lot. Mom said I could cheat if I wanted. But I was gonna do it. My little "cheat" day was Saturday with the potato salad, and I wasn't ready for another one yet. So after I managed to separate the spaghetti from itself and put half of what I'd gotten on my plate back, I moved to load up most of my plate with salad. As soon as mom got a plate, she said, "I'll get more than a cup." Chuckling a little, I "thanked" her for rubbing it in. About that time, dad came in to get his plate and gave a long, overly loud gasp. Mom and I turned to him questioningly. "I'm just so used to seeing a plate full of spaghetti in her hands!" he exclaimed, acting completely aghast. I glared at him and kept going.
I guess it was kind of one of those things you had to be there for. The whole situation was really funny. After I ate, I was planning on going back for a second portion-sized helping (I was full, but it was just so freakin' good!!!), but I managed to not get sucked in and had one of my Weight Watchers ice cream bars instead. Those things are good, and even though I'm not doing Weight Watchers, they're still good for being relatively low in calories! On that note, I try to ask myself after one helping of a meal, "Do I really want another helping? If I have another one, then I can't have dessert. Which do I want more?" Of course, dessert always wins!

Monday, March 22, 2010

Week #2

I think this week went a lot better than the first. I didn't feel quite as tempted as last week. I was sick most of the week with seasonal allergies...ugh! I think I may have blown the weight out of my nose! It was definitely not a good time to be a groomer!
I did have a "cheat" day on Saturday. We had burgers and potato salad. Anyone who knows me knows I ABSOLUTELY LOOOOOOOVE mom's potato salad. So, of course, I snuck a little more than a proper helping! Don't get me wrong...it was still considerably less than what I'd used to get as a "serving." And I only had one burger. So, really, I think I did pretty darn well!
Mom and dad planted some stuff in the garden this weekend, too. I can't wait to get this house so we can get our own garden started. I LOVE fresh veggies.
Anyhoo...so, because not much happened in this past week, I won't keep you guys waiting on the edge of your seats any longer...

248. Yep...another 5 pounds! It's great! So far I love the gym. I've discovered it's a wonderful stress reliever after crap I get from work. It kicked my butt today, though, let me tell you. The tops of my legs were burning while I was on the bike. I guess that's supposed to be a good thing, but it hurt like heck! So, I guess until next time...

Monday, March 15, 2010

Week #1

Well, the first week is over. As you've read, it hasn't been easy. Not that I particularly thought it would be, but still. I'd like to say I did really well. I only did portion sizes...though I did cheat here or there, mainly with starches. I'm sorry. I can't help it. I just love pasta and mashed potatoes and the like too much. But I only had one helping per meal.
I started at the gym today. Is it okay to say that it was kinda fun? :-) I know, I say that now, right? I did half an hour on the treadmill doing the "calorie burner" setting, and then did a half hour on the bike, again doing the "calorie burner." The treadmill I kept on the original settings for the program. I didn't alter the speed or incline which automatically change throughout the routine. The bike I did second and therefore was a little worn out by the time I got to it, so I had to turn the resistance down. I walked a total of 1.5 miles and then biked 6.8 miles. Needless to say, my legs were the consistency of jelly!
Oh, I have to tell you my first experience at the gym, though, so let me back up. Mike and I get there (he hadn't signed up yet, but I was given a free, one-day guest pass when I signed up and he wanted to go...he's now signed up) and we walk up to the front door. I look on the glass to see the times of operation written boldly on there. I read the line: Mon-Thur 5:30-9:00. I panicked. "Mike," I said. "What time is it?"
"About 4:30. Why?"
"Oh! We can't go in yet. It doesn't open 'til 5:30."
We looked in the building to see people already working out. That's when it hit me...5:30 AM! I smiled sheepishly as Mike's head swayed side to side.
"Shut up," I muttered as I snuck through the door in front of him.
But that's not all. We were shown the locker rooms. We were not shown the locks, however. They were the set-your-own combo lock. Basically, you find a locker that's open, then before you lock it, you can set the numbers to whatever you want. You know, something you can usually REMEMBER. I had forgotten my water, so in between the treadmill and the bike, I went back to retrieve it. I thought I knew the combo. I tried every combo, KNOWING the first and last numbers were 7 and 8. Finally, a nice woman beside me asked, "You forget the combo?"
I sighed. "Yeah."
"You're first time here?"
I grinned. "Yep."
She chuckled. "You can either call up front or go up there and they'll open it for you. I always use my birthday as my combination."
I went up front to get assistance. On the way back to the locker room, the woman asked me, "Is this your first time here?"
That's obvious, you think? "Yeah."
"Well, congratulations! You've just been initiated!" I laughed. She went on, "Believe it or not, I actually get this woman on the phone a lot...'Umm, yeah. I'm a repeat offender.'"
(*sigh*) So, all-in-all, it was an interesting experience. I figure I'll try to do Monday, Wednesday, Friday, about an hour a day.
And after one week...253! Ten whole pounds! SWEET!
(And Eric...Bohler says hi)

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Trials

I'm slightly depressed right now. Tonight after dinner, Mike and I took a quick trip to Walmart to pick up some things. On the way out, Mike's like, "Ooh, Dairy Queen." He then turned to me and his kid-in-the-candy-shop grin faded a little and he's quickly said, "No, that's right, you can't have any." I told him it was okay, that I could just get a little one or a shake or something. I've been doing well, so I figured I could binge, right? We pull in and as we get out of the car, I realized it was after 8. I panicked. This was a rule I had set for myself...no eating after 8. I'd seen it on Biggest Loser one time that it's not good to eat that late (I think your metabolism slows way down by then as you're usually getting ready for bed by this time...or something like that). We went in and were waiting in line and I was thinking, "You could have just a little bit, Sam. It's not going to kill you. You're going to the gym tomorrow. You'll be fine. Go ahead." Then Mike mentioned that I'd have to drive home, because he wouldn't be able to eat and drive. Heaving a sigh, I firmed my resolve. We got to the counter. Mike put in his order for a Heath Bar Blizzard. The cashier cheerfully asked if that was all. "Wait," my mind screamed. "No, I want..." But I bit my lip and she rang him up. I had managed to win this small battle.
But on the way home, my mind was churning as I drove. Mike finished his Blizzard and we rode in silence for a while. Trying to not feel bad about it, I asked him how it was. "It was good," he replied, but I heard the guilt in his voice. Finally, I told him to tell me I was doing the right thing, that I was doing good. Are you kidding me?!?!?! It's been one week...one MEASLY week since I started this and already I was caving this bad? I'm pitiful! Mike told me he was proud of me for doing this and that I was doing wonderfully so far, to just stay with it. I just can't believe I am that weak that I want to give up after one week. I've realized I've been whiney about not being able to eat more. Part of me says to just screw the whole thing, I'll never get any lighter. I've gone this long this way, I can go longer, right? (*sigh*)
Weigh-in's tomorrow. I'm going to the gym after work with Mike (I'm a little nervous for some reason), and then I'll get home and log on to let you guys know how I've done. Crossing my fingers!

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Veggies with Dessert

Please don't hate me! I had a really weak moment today! I was out with a friend today and we decided to go to Luigi's in Culpeper. It's an Italian restaurant, and anyone who knows me knows well enough that I LOVE pasta! But I was going to be good. I got the vegetarian manicotti Florentine, which has spinach. I had a salad with it. When the meal came, I slowly ate one manicotti, trying to take my time. But as I sat watching Heather and her almost-two-year-old daughter feeding each other's faces (no, literally, Chloe's meal ended up mostly on her face!), the other manicotti was sitting there under my nose. I tried ignoring it, but I had nothing to occupy my mind and/or attention (well, except bread...really, REALLY good homemade bread that I'd already had two pieces). Needless to say, it followed it's twin into my belly. (*hanging my head in shame*) I know! I'm sorry. But that's not all...I had a piece of carrot cake. It was a portion size, in my defense! (*sigh*) At least it was carrot cake...I passed up the Death by Chocolate. I swear it won't happen again...much?

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Temptation

I know I said I'd give you weekly updates, and I will, but I just had to vent for a moment. It's only been three days, true, but this is kinda hard! I guess I knew it would be, but you don't really miss something until it's gone. I never realized how much I ate before now. I'm not starving, mind you. It's actually going better than I had imagined (hence the "kinda" hard). I've been good...taking only the correct portions and not going back for seconds. Although, I have to tell you, I got a little hung up on dinner tonight. My portions chart didn't have a listing for hamburger helper! Mom told me to go with the pretty much standard cup serving size. And I've realized that I'm not HUNGRY after dinner. I could eat more, sure, but I'm not starving or anything. Pretty much the only reason I feel like I want to go back for more is for the taste of it...it tastes so good! I try to make the food last as long as I can while I eat it, though. I chew slower, trying to savor each bite. I break things up into pieces. Anything to make me FEEL fuller. I've been trying to drink more water, too, you know, as a filler. All this helps, but I hope my willpower will hold. Man, I'm so weak...

Monday, March 8, 2010

Cue "Rocky Theme"

Hello!!!!
I'm glad you all followed me over here! You know, the whole two of you! No, I know there's more of you. Anyhoo...If you came by way of my other blog "Life's a Musical" you'll know that I'm doing this because I want to lose weight and feel better about myself. I've dealt with weight problems my whole life, and have now discovered that I am at my all-time high at 263 pounds. Yes, you read correctly. As embarrassing as it is to tell you my weight, I am doing it to give you, and myself, a starting reference. I get lower back pain throughout the day due to bad posture and just hanging weight. I'm always winded just from doing small things. I've had the awkward moment when a complete stranger asked me when I was due (it didn't help that I had a pale blue scrub top with puppies all over it, but that's beside the point). But to top it all off, I went to my brother's wedding this weekend and split the side of BRAND NEW dress pants, WHILE wearing my Spanx! Yeah, I think that's telling me something.
My plan is to find out what REAL portion sizes are and stick to them. That, and I hope to get a membership at a fitness center in Culpeper. Mike and I are moving up there soon, and it would be on the way home from work, so I figured I could stop by for half an hour to an hour a day or so. I'm not going to do any fad diets, I'm going to do it...well...I guess naturally, if you want to call it that. I will log on to here every week with an update as to how much weight loss and/or gain (hopefully none of the latter), and then try to get a picture on here monthly. I know it's going to be a long, hard road, but I hope with your guys' support, I can do it. Feel free to send me comments and e-mails of encouragement. It'll help to know that I have that.
So, without further ado...

Starting weight: 263